It’s difficult. There’s a real art to it. And there’s a few best practices that can be incorporated into any user research playbook that can dramatically increase both the quality and quantity of insights generated while you’re talking to people using your product or service.

First, come prepared. Beforehand, ask yourself: “What am I trying to learn from this conversation?” Only from those answers can you then derive: “What am I going to ask?” This separation is important, because it turns out that these two sets of results end up be being very different. By doing this, you not only improve the signal you receive, but also increase your sensitivity to it.

Next, put the person you’re speaking with at ease. Smile. Make eye contact (but don’t stare). Call them by their name. Offer them food and drink. Get them to open up about themselves (and be willing to open up about yourself as well). It also helps to make it clear that you’re not the person who’s building the product that you’re presenting. Otherwise, people tend to withhold honest feedback. And then, have a few people (<= 4, including the person you’re listening to) in the room. While one interviewer should ask ~90% of the questions, having this social padding makes sure that the environment feels like a conversation rather than an interrogation. Having others present also allows one other person to own note taking—that way the interviewer can focus wholly on making your guest feel comfortable and keeping the conversation on track.

During the conversation:

• NEVER interrupt,

• be comfortable with silence, and

• encourage continued responses without suggesting what you’d like to hear.

A good framework for the final point above is to only ask open-ended questions (What / Why / How). (Avoid binary and leading questions.) During conversation, it can be helpful to leverage silence and extend an incomplete answer with “And then you…”

Remember: you’re there to listen.